The end of a marriage might be one of the painful experiences that a person has to face. Even for a spouse who decides to leave, divorce seems to bring him a sense of anger, grief, fear, shame, confusion, anxiety, guilt and other intense emotions. In case the kids are involved, the level of stress is likely to be higher. Sometimes, we have a tendency to seek marriage counseling to aid us in deciding whether to leave or stay in this marital life. Others can seek couples therapy so that they can be more confident in making the transition from a spousal life to a single one.
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There are a number of reasons why couples get divorced. However, the most common reasons identified by lots of the partners include:
- Lack commitment
- Have lots of opposite arguments
- Get inequality in marriage, regarding chores or children’s care
- Be in a physical and emotional violence/abuse
- Deal with financial matters and disagreements about money
- Lack respect and show a contempt for each other
Once a marriage comes to an end, it will be emotionally traumatic for everyone involved. To deal with the painful physical, mental and financial process of healing, choosing to begin marriage counseling is a wise idea. In general, this service will be done on a person basis. When we are facing the feelings of fear, anxiety, guilt, grief and depression, working with a skillful therapist may give a rational and objective perspective and equip us with some essential skills to overcome the choppy waters of divorce smoothly. Furthermore, individuals who depend on therapy during this tough time can benefit from learning deeply about themselves and viewing the life’s transition as a wonderful chance of personal growth and development.
In some cases, separation can contribute or exacerbate the mental health conditions including depression, hopelessness or confusion. Some can see divorce as a personal failure. Coming to marriage counseling, we will get help to control these negative emotions, and then gain a new and positive perspective. At times, separation will be an opportunity to make us become a wiser and stronger person. These qualities can be helpful for us in the future relationships.
Believe it or not, marriage counseling is also available for those who are in the process of separation, as a beneficial means for working together in a constructive and healthy way to obtain the dissolution of the marriage. Basically, a counselor shall act as a mediator, and then set the guideline to make sure that the divorce can be gained with the minimal hostilities and emotional damages. Sometimes, she may address the pertinent problems such as parenting responsibilities, financial obligations and living arrangements.
Therapy may be highly important for kids who have to experience a separated situation. Since their parents seem to be consumed with their own emotions, they can overlook their children’s devastating emotional states. In fact, the kids will experience the sense of loss, pain, hurt, guilt and overwhelming confusion during the separation. Sometimes, they may struggle with a guilty obsession that they are the main cause for the divorce. In case their parents are more aggressive, these kids will even feel more nervous and fearful. Visiting marriage therapists, children will have an occasion to open their thoughts and talk out all of their stressful issues.
In brief, this service will be the best place for divorced couples and their kids to find the better way to control their future lives after separation. A therapist will analyze the potential troubles in their marital lives, and then offer the considerate resolutions.
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